Long Post #1 (284 words):
“I’m here. What do you need?”
- Kristoff to Anna, Frozen 2.
Best. Line. Ever.
In case you haven’t seen the movie (fewer than 50 times), here’s the context: Kristoff has no idea where Anna has been, or what she’s been doing. When he finally catches up with her, she’s being chased by Earth Giants. Anna’s need is really obvious. And urgent.
It’s the last thing you expect Kristoff to say.
It’s exactly what Anna needs to hear.
As parents, we’re equipping our teens to be independent and self-sufficient. This is easy to do in some situations- like letting them drive themselves to soccer practice.
Other situations are a lot trickier to navigate. Bullying and toxic peer behavior feel like the high school equivalent of Earth Giants chasing Anna. When our teens encounter these situations, they feel obvious and urgent. It’s our instinct to step in and get our child out- as fast as possible- and give those mean friends a piece of our minds while we’re at it.
BUT what our teens need to hear is often the last thing we expect to say!
DO: listen and let them know how proud you are when they recognize bad behavior.
DON’T: overreact and tell them how bad the situation really is.
DO: assure them that you’re going to get through it together. You’re there to support them.
DON’T: take matters into your own hands and try to fix it!
DO: ask them what they need.
DON’T: tell them what to do.
In other words, they need to hear us say, “I love you. I’m proud of you. I’m here. What do you need?”
They’re learning to fight their own battles. And we’re cheering them on.
[Link to bullying resources]
Long Post #2 (143 words):
As parents, we’re equipping our ADHD teens to be independent and self-sufficient. This transition is a learning curve for us, too!
Some steps are easier for us to take than others. It’s easy to let them drive themselves to soccer practice. It’s gut wrenching to watch them navigate toxic peer behavior. We want to rescue them!
BUT what our teens need to hear is often the last thing we expect to say.
DON’T overreact and tell them how bad the situation really is.
DO listen and let them know how proud you are when they recognize bad behavior.
DON’T take matters into your own hands and try to fix it.
DO assure them that you’ll get through it together.
DON’T tell them what to do.
DO ask them what they need.
They’re learning to fight their own battles. And we’re cheering them on.
Caption Options:
Don’t tell your teens what to do. Ask them what they need.
We’re the parents. It’s our job to fuel our teen’s passions. Not their outbursts.
Our ADHD teens need to hear us say, “I love you. I’m proud of you. I’m here. What do you need?”
Photo by Zachary Nelson on Unsplash